Majorwoody

What I've read is that often the women don't want to marry and that at least in some cases, the guys have jobs that move them around a lot (construction being the biggie) and do send money home.

The same pattern shows up with any number of people whose lives are precarious. The children are a better investment for care in old age than a man.

Birth rates in Latin America are going down. Friend of mine asked some Guatemalan women about family planning and the plan is to have two or three children and then get sterilized (more reliable and cheaper in the long run than other solutions).

I know some perfectly okay guys who were raised by single mothers -- the problem often isn't so much the absent father but the overly indulgent moms (some of my black students in the US and some women here) who will do anything for the boys now to bind them to her for later.

Nicaraguans in the 19th Century shocked Thomas Belt with how the women were having babies out of wedlock and telling the Anglo women who were shocked that they were prudes. Nothing new for here. Sandino wasn't the only bastard of a rich man and a poor woman here. Both Sandino and Fonseca did get support from their fathers.

What happens to old men here who've never had contact with their children? The old women make it possible for their daughters to be working while grannie tends the children, so they have some value to their children.

Interesting and good points MizBrown. I think you are somewhat correct about some of the women not wanting to marry, but my experience in that regard is it is the ones that already have kids that do not want to marry usually. Down here I have run across, a little more than in Mexico, the situation where the girl get pregnant with the first boyfriend/intimate liaison and does want to marry, but either the marriage never happens or the boy/man takes off. Child support here is an odd thing, what many of the men know is that if they do not "recognize" the child then they really have nothing to fear. Hence most do not.

Women here seem to not trust, with good reason, the men to stay with them or stay faithful, hence they are much more bonded to the child. The problem I see in this country, at least in Managua and its environs, is that the single mothers have to work very long schedules. It is not like the US where there is typically an 8 hour day or 40 hours a week. Here the week is 48 hours and many folks have long commutes due to no personal transportation, that makes for 12-14 hour days, which leaves little if any time for the actual mother to be with kids. Hence they are either raised by a relative, grandmother many times, or they are pooled off to "happenstance guarderias" in the barrios or a group of mothers hires a nanny for their kids. None of those are good situations.

I would absolutely agree with the over indulgent mother situation you mention, that is big time present here in Latin America towards the males. I am curious about the birth rate in Nicaragua, and while the birth rate may be declining so is infant mortality along with the population longevity increasing. That is precarious cocktail for a struggling society that has not developed a fleet enough industrial base and or economy to completely support it.

Ironically Thomas Belt's description of the politics and governments of Nicaragua, and Central America for that matter, was as apt then as it is now. In his description of the society back then something always struck me as odd, in that he mentions that marriage was not that important to the Nicaraguans but Baptism was. I never understood that as I had always understood that in the 18th and 19th centuries the marriages, many of them basically arranged, were a way for not only the upper but also the fringe upper and small middle classes to solidify wealth and political fortune for the future.

Most people in Central America then were the human equivalent of John Deere tractors and combines and Roundup. Still are to a certain extent in countries with almost 50% still in agricultural production.

IT HAS BEEN ALMOST 2 YEARS NOW!

2 years in bits and pieces. I did a lot or reading before deciding to try Nicaragua. Learned about the termites at the air port. The taxi drivers the street hustlers and real estate hustlers. Traveled from Leon to SJDS. Thought about the experiences as I went along. Met my first builder in Granada and some people I can call friends. First builder declined to build because he felt I was to picky. That was part true. He had better choices. Liked him, not his cookie cutter houses. Tested a few others and ended up with a Nica builder. I read about the people in general. The poverty set me back a little. Explained why they see us as piggy banks. I had the worst experiences with Gringos (epats) Who had a better idea of what they could hustle from me. Most Nica's only could guess. Bought in a area that is mostly locals. I feel more comfort here. Although the reading and experiences leave me more careful than I want to be.

I do not see the people that represent the worst of us. I believe by not looking for them. I do not see the Gringo drunks. Know what they look like here in the US. I hope that my home will be secluded enough in a area rich in locals and poor in expats to learn a culture not a place to hide out with other Gringos. It is a small fortress that maybe I can leave once in a while to make friends with the locals and help with the local kids who are homeless all around me. I love these people most who live with so little without a lot of complaint. I cannot relate to all the stories in this blog. Do not want to. I do want a relationship with the everyday people.