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  1. #1
    Active TRN Member webtrainer's Avatar
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    Default Save El Porton Verde (and my son!)

    Greetings all: This is Mike Quinn aka webtrainer and I wanted to update everyone as to what's going on with my life. Basically, it is sucking big time... I'm in an urgent, critical situation.

    Please support me through GoFundMe: https://www.gofundme.com/save-el-porton-verde

    You might have seen my Facebook posts about this but of course on there I can't really get into details. First off, if anyone can help me, I really need help. I'm in the classic "land rich, cash poor" situation. I've been locked out of my own house/farm, I had to shut down my bnb business, El Porton Verde, I'm effectively homeless, staying with a friend in Managua, and based on what my lawyer has found out about the case I have pending, it looks like my ex'es family is in it to win it so to speak, so this will go on for a while.

    The usual dumb male gringo story... I met a girl, I thought I couldn't get anyone pregnant, we had a baby almost right away, bada bading she's living with me and we have our beautiful son Mickey. Then stupid me, her younger brother and sisters were alone in a house in La Subasta so wouldn't it be better if they lived here? Then the mother-in-law kicked out the elder daughter when she was eight months pregnant, so there you go, another person, followed quickly thereafter by her son. Then finally, why spend money on rent for a house in La Subasta MIL and step-father, why not give me that money for raising your kids instead? So I went from being single to effectively having five children and four adults under my roof.

    Well needless to say, it didn't go all that well. The family are Costeñas from Puerto Cabezas and especially the MIL (and now her daughter, my ex) are very violent. It took me quite a while to get them to not go to the belt to beat the kids for whatever thing they did. Getting along with all of these people has been a huge challenge. We had to go to the police station several times for intrafamily violence, mediation, all that stuff. This is sister vs sister, sister vs MIL, etc. I knew better than to get physical with these people. For one, the Nicaraguan laws are inequal between the sexes. A man can scratch a woman and go to jail. A woman needs to machete off a limb to get into any kind of trouble. Second, these women, my ex and her mother are big people, almost my height and outweigh me by maybe 70 lbs.

    I was working with my ex to have her agree that we needed to get rid of the family members. I really thought I had convinced her, to give the nuclear family a chance, but it was all a big act. I had been reflecting on my existence and became aware that this whole situation was insane. I certainly didn't come to Nicaragua to be in so much stress. Paz y tranquilidad is what I was looking for! I was determined to change this and the first mandatory move was to get rid of the family.

    On the way to the lawyers to find out how to do that, I discover there's no $$$ in my wallet. We go back to the house (ostensibly to "find" the money...) and when I stop the truck she goes running into our room and locks the door. I use my key to open it, and ask her what is she doing? She says she knows I'm fooling around on her (not true) and proceeds to throw me around and then starts choking me. I don't resist, I ask her to calm down so we can talk about it, etc. But she kept on choking me, I couldn't breath, I was getting lightheaded, I really felt like I was going to die. Her sisters were outside the door just watching. With my last remaining breath, I plead for help and they do absolutely nothing.

    Fun story, huh? So finally she gets off of me. It wasn't my turn to die, at least that day! I'm wracking my breath, the adrenaline is flowing, and I needed to go to the police station to report this. But she took my truck keys during the violence. So I take my child with me and he and I make our way via caponeara and bus to the police station. She's already there, talking to an officer that we both know. I report the crime, but they don't send me to Medicina Legal for a physical or psychological exam. I leave to go to the gas station on the corner and wait for the investigator. He finally arrives and we go to the farm. It's obvious that we can't agree to be calm towards each other, so back to the station we go. We finally talk to the captain and they finally agree to send me to Medicina Legal for the physical. When there, the doctor tells me I need to go back and ask for the psychological exam.

    So I do both, and have the chance to recount the atmosphere of violence, the fights, the threats, the consistent pressure streaming from the MIL and her daughter. And my concern that I don't want my son to grow up in that sort of family, where violence is normalized. Once the family gets wind that I'm trying to get custody of my boy, all hell breaks loose. I have at least a chance to win the custody battle, and if so, their meal ticket (my boy) is worthless to them. So now they've got my DL, passport, almost all of my clothes, etc. I did get the truck and the escritura to my property.

    I've spoken to the US Embassy but they really aren't any help. I've started my GoFundMe to get some emergency cash, but now the legal costs are growing as the family now is saying that I've molested the children, and some other things maybe even worse. The saying "When you have nothing to lose, you lose it." comes to mind as the family definitely is going all-out in this legal battle and are not limited to the facts of the situation.

    If you've come this far, hey thanks for reading...I've got at least a decent lawyer, it would be nice to be able to afford a Paul Tiffer or someone like that, but I don't have thousands of dollars at hand. If you can help me, please do so. Thank you.

    https://www.gofundme.com/save-el-porton-verde

    Cheers, Mike (formerly and hopefully soon to be again) @ El Porton Verde, Managua
    Doors of hope fly open when doors of promise shut. -Thomas D'Arcy McGee

  2. #2
    House SOB Little Corn Tom's Avatar
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    Default Re: Save El Porton Verde (and my son!)

    Jesus......
    Life's different here ... It's a whole 'nother pace.

  3. #3
    Para aquí para acá Jonh's Avatar
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    Default Re: Save El Porton Verde (and my son!)

    Welcome to Nicaragua, the safest country in Central America and the 43rd happiest country in the world.

  4. #4
    Viejo del Foro Daddy-YO's Avatar
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    Default Re: Save El Porton Verde (and my son!)

    Poor soul. Makes me rethink the term 'pussy-whipped'.
    I never met a Semite I didn't like.

  5. #5

    Default Re: Save El Porton Verde (and my son!)

    I hear tell that there are some women in Nicaragua who aren't violent or angry or vindictive or spiteful...but so far I haven't met them.
    Soy el chele mono.

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    House SOB Little Corn Tom's Avatar
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    Default Re: Save El Porton Verde (and my son!)

    Quote Originally Posted by drlemcor View Post
    I hear tell that there are some women in Nicaragua who aren't violent or angry or vindictive or spiteful...but so far I haven't met them.

    That is because they do NOT exist.
    Life's different here ... It's a whole 'nother pace.

  7. #7

    Default Re: Save El Porton Verde (and my son!)

    Quote Originally Posted by Daddy-YO View Post
    Poor soul. Makes me rethink the term 'pussy-whipped'.


    Except,,, he's getting whipped without the pussy .. .

    HANG IN THERE MIKE!

  8. #8
    Active TRN Member RGV AG's Avatar
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    Default Re: Save El Porton Verde (and my son!)

    Webtrainer: You are now suffering from the after effects of a bite of the mundane by appearance, but lethal in venom "Brown Breasted Mattress Thrasher". This is a common species in LatAm, and in Nicaragua they travel and associate with their paks/covens for basically eternity. A wound by this species is very similar to a bite/sting from a Brown Recluse Spider, but much longer lasting, but with more rot and festering. Cookshow's advice is gospel, cut your losses how and the best way you can. If you can ransom the child, try to do so in a manner that gives you legal right to take the child out of Nicaragua. The mother has to sign all kinds of things in blood and such, but get the hell away from that mess. Be very wary of being bled dry with little bits of hope and small tokens of reconciliation and or accommodation. I hope things work out, and just remember that the child is growing everyday and that whatever you now do should be set towards extracting that child from the jaws of dysfunction.

  9. #9

    Default Re: Save El Porton Verde (and my son!)

    Quote Originally Posted by RGV AG View Post
    Webtrainer: You are now suffering from the after effects of a bite of the mundane by appearance, but lethal in venom "Brown Breasted Mattress Thrasher". This is a common species in LatAm, and in Nicaragua they travel and associate with their paks/covens for basically eternity. A wound by this species is very similar to a bite/sting from a Brown Recluse Spider, but much longer lasting, but with more rot and festering. Cookshow's advice is gospel, cut your losses how and the best way you can. If you can ransom the child, try to do so in a manner that gives you legal right to take the child out of Nicaragua. The mother has to sign all kinds of things in blood and such, but get the hell away from that mess. Be very wary of being bled dry with little bits of hope and small tokens of reconciliation and or accommodation. I hope things work out, and just remember that the child is growing everyday and that whatever you now do should be set towards extracting that child from the jaws of dysfunction.



    Yes, your child is what counts here. There are scores of BBMT's (this alone would have gotten you banned from the Leon FaceBookGroup) but your son is unique and precious and, more importantly, he needs you.

    Are you staying in Nicaragua?

  10. #10
    Viejo del Foro Daddy-YO's Avatar
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    Default Re: Save El Porton Verde (and my son!)

    Swinging Richard meets the Brown Breasted Mattress Thrasher in the steamy tropics of Nicaragua - Marvel Comics may be interested in buying the rights to this story.


    Clearly the Aggie knows of what he speaks. Ransom the kid, find a parachute and jump. What was your property is theirs now. I would be amazed if you get the legal right to take your son out of the country. But if you had him long enough to secret him across the border . . . you would not be the first to do such.
    I never met a Semite I didn't like.

  11. #11
    TRN Science officer bill_bly_ca's Avatar
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    Default Re: Save El Porton Verde (and my son!)

    Sorry for the adventure Mike - I'll drop a bit in the next couple day.
    ==================================================
    Dude !!!.... Its a Canal !!! Can you Dig it ??

  12. #12
    Viejo del Foro el duende grande's Avatar
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    Default Re: Save El Porton Verde (and my son!)

    Sorry to hear of your problems, but thanx for warning the rubes. They have been pumped up on the wonders of the Nicaraguan family, so close, so caring, so in love with the chillrens... Most of the younger rubes have been raise on the Equality Myth all of their lives in the Romper Room so they have no clue of up from down.

    A primer for swinging richards--look at the whole family, not just miss sweetie pie. Any drunks, druggies, baby machines, narcissists, boy men, fathers who don't live in the home and work and you need to ring up a big No Sale. Keep looking, maybe you will find an evangelical and teach her how to have sex. Or maybe you will strike out but find a foreigner...

    "Support mental health or I'll break your head"


  13. #13
    House SOB Little Corn Tom's Avatar
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    Default Re: Save El Porton Verde (and my son!)

    Quote Originally Posted by el duende grande View Post
    A primer for swinging richards--look at the whole family, not just miss sweetie pie. Any drunks, druggies, baby machines, narcissists, boy men, fathers who don't live in the home and work and you need to ring up a big No Sale. Keep looking, maybe you will find an evangelical and teach her how to have sex. Or maybe you will strike out but find a foreigner...

    Amen, Bro....Amen......

    It would be great if "Swinging Richards" could think and analyze, but this is rarely the case. Everything you say is true......but almost universally ignored as we have seen over the years on TRN.

    Better to bring your love(er) to Nica with you and find your spot.

    I remember riding the panga to Little Corn one trip and noticing this gringo and his Nica wife. He was middle aged, over weight and jovial. She was drop dead gorgeous......by any standard in this world. I mean she was staggeringly beautiful. Well we ended up at the same place to stay on Little Corn (Derek's Place) and I got to watch him dote on her (as would any male on this planet) while she made eye contact with any other male around her. There was no way that there was a happy ending to this relationship.....at least for him.

    Oh well....welcome to planet earth, eh?
    Life's different here ... It's a whole 'nother pace.

  14. #14
    Viejo del Foro el duende grande's Avatar
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    Default Re: Save El Porton Verde (and my son!)

    At least if you find a foreigner and she burns out on Nic you will have someplace to go! Unless she's a muslim, i guess.

    "Support mental health or I'll break your head"


  15. #15

    Default Re: Save El Porton Verde (and my son!)

    Quote Originally Posted by Little Corn Tom View Post
    Amen, Bro....Amen......

    It would be great if "Swinging Richards" could think and analyze, but this is rarely the case. Everything you say is true......but almost universally ignored as we have seen over the years on TRN.

    Better to bring your love(er) to Nica with you and find your spot.

    I remember riding the panga to Little Corn one trip and noticing this gringo and his Nica wife. He was middle aged, over weight and jovial. She was drop dead gorgeous......by any standard in this world. I mean she was staggeringly beautiful. Well we ended up at the same place to stay on Little Corn (Derek's Place) and I got to watch him dote on her (as would any male on this planet) while she made eye contact with any other male around her. There was no way that there was a happy ending to this relationship.....at least for him.

    Oh well....welcome to planet earth, eh?


    BUT-------- It's great while it lasts. Where else but Nicaragua do you find a drop dead gorgeous babe to ride a panga with you to to Corn Island??
    What would be this guy's chance in the US. It's all about the moment.

    Unless some Sandi wants his hotel,, Porton Verde will come out of this OK. I had a brief experience with the court system,, maid who stole from me,,, and I was impressed with the fairness of it all. He just needs to get some Ambien and wait it out. Does take forever

    Sure,,, if the deck is stacked against you, if Comandante Zero wants your beach,, you are toast,, but for the most part . . .

  16. #16

    Default Re: Save El Porton Verde (and my son!)

    Quote Originally Posted by Little Corn Tom View Post
    Amen, Bro....Amen......

    It would be great if "Swinging Richards" could think and analyze, but this is rarely the case. Everything you say is true......but almost universally ignored as we have seen over the years on TRN.

    Better to bring your love(er) to Nica with you and find your spot.

    I remember riding the panga to Little Corn one trip and noticing this gringo and his Nica wife. He was middle aged, over weight and jovial. She was drop dead gorgeous......by any standard in this world. I mean she was staggeringly beautiful. Well we ended up at the same place to stay on Little Corn (Derek's Place) and I got to watch him dote on her (as would any male on this planet) while she made eye contact with any other male around her. There was no way that there was a happy ending to this relationship.....at least for him.

    Oh well....welcome to planet earth, eh?


    i've been thinking land and hard about all of this (Old guys and younger girls) . I suspect that many if not most who come to Nicaragua are "it's about the journey and not the destination" people. On this site there is clearly a balance, and this balance offers a nice perspective. A few have established connections to Nicaragua,, such as a wife.

    A few make a good connection here, but it's not easy. Language and culture get in the way of a relationship, and the chosen target is often simply not suitable.

    Like the well documented account of a 72 YO interested in an 18 YO.
    Still, we never do find out what finally happens with Professor Higgins and Eliza.
    So, the romantic fool in us lives on.
    'Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all . . . doesn't really apply but suggests the motivation.

    ALL of my siblings are "destination" people. Successful, asset-rich, settled, happy. No divorces. Watch a lot of football.
    If they travel it's an organized tour, a cruise.

    I've been there, but the grass has always been greener on the other side of the fence.
    Curse, or blessing ?? It comes down to, journey or destination ????

    There are many answers to "Why Are You In Nicaragua"? As many have pointed out,, you can probably live less expensively in some rural areas of the US, and still have access to superior health care, better food, and a wider range of amenities.

    But,, still they come to Nicaragua.

  17. #17
    Viejo del Foro el duende grande's Avatar
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    Default Re: Save El Porton Verde (and my son!)

    and women who think like you do.

    In the US if you said "you can take the girl out of the country but you can't take the country out of the girl" it would be a compliment.
    Not so here.

    "Support mental health or I'll break your head"


  18. #18
    TRN Science officer bill_bly_ca's Avatar
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    Default Re: Save El Porton Verde (and my son!)

    On this site there is clearly a balance, and this balance offers a nice perspective. A few have established connections to Nicaragua,, such as a wife.
    I am pretty sure that if something happens to Maria my interest in Niclandia will cease as well. It is a nice place with nice people and the like, but in no way would I look to rehook up with someone young (Did the parenting, child rearing thang, not looking to do that again). Any other of relation would be awkward with the money undertones .

    Probably head up north and tend a park beside the wawa goose or something...

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    Last edited by bill_bly_ca; 06-28-2017 at 12:01 PM.
    ==================================================
    Dude !!!.... Its a Canal !!! Can you Dig it ??

  19. #19
    Viejo del Foro Daddy-YO's Avatar
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    Default Re: Save El Porton Verde (and my son!)

    Quote Originally Posted by el duende grande View Post
    A primer for swinging richards--look at the whole family, not just miss sweetie pie. Any drunks, druggies, baby machines, narcissists, boy men, fathers who don't live in the home and work and you need to ring up a big No Sale.
    Solid advice for the lovelorn.

    A little perspective: we foreigners are guests in this country. Tho not PC to say so, it's a 3rd world country. And poor - think Haiti. Many expats with fistfuls of dollars feel disproportionately powerful here - it's a delusion. When push comes to shove for property or personal rights, the ultimate arbiters are Nica judges, Sandinistas.

    Sure money talks - most people in 3rd world countries consider 'bribes' part of employee's salary, so to speak. But 'justice' may cost a foreign guest dearly. Remember Jason Puracal? Especially, if up against impoverished citizens. Remember Eric Voltz?

    When big money rubs against real poverty (albeit sexy), more than sparks may fly. There can be tragic results. Remember Ken Kinzel's story as it played out in Esteli? It should be required reading for all old 'swinging Richards' expats visiting Nicaragua on Viagra.
    I never met a Semite I didn't like.

  20. #20
    Viejo del Foro el duende grande's Avatar
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    Default Re: Save El Porton Verde (and my son!)

    Yes, we are guests but we are paying guests and those of us who have residency and Nic. families have a vested interest in at least surviving if not thriving. I think the day will come when we will be talking about the "good old days". Watch out when the first recession comes, things are going to get nasty. Dig in, mind your own business, associate with quality people, etc.

    The latest curve now comes from the other camp-- the US Consulate. Seems the law has changed or been reinterpreted that the Relatives of a US citizen cannot visit the US on a temporary visa unless they can Individually prove income. Property and banks accounts don't count, must have job or business. Housewives supported by the husbands are Statutory Non-persons and cannot claim hubbies' income as a source of support. Local scuttlebutt is that the Donald doesn't like Danny, but who knows. Maybe the US just got tired of relatives jumping ship.

    "Support mental health or I'll break your head"


  21. #21

    Default Re: Save El Porton Verde (and my son!)

    I heard that Paul Tiffer has 27 residencies on his desk,, going nowhere.

    Any other such news.

    Indeed, what would Nicaragua do without its expats?

  22. #22
    The Bard of Jinotega MizBrown's Avatar
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    Default Re: Save El Porton Verde (and my son!)

    Quote Originally Posted by Daddy-YO View Post
    Solid advice for the lovelorn.

    A little perspective: we foreigners are guests in this country. Tho not PC to say so, it's a 3rd world country. And poor - think Haiti. Many expats with fistfuls of dollars feel disproportionately powerful here - it's a delusion. When push comes to shove for property or personal rights, the ultimate arbiters are Nica judges, Sandinistas.

    Sure money talks - most people in 3rd world countries consider 'bribes' part of employee's salary, so to speak. But 'justice' may cost a foreign guest dearly. Remember Jason Puracal? Especially, if up against impoverished citizens. Remember Eric Voltz?

    When big money rubs against real poverty (albeit sexy), more than sparks may fly. There can be tragic results. Remember Ken Kinzel's story as it played out in Esteli? It should be required reading for all old 'swinging Richards' expats visiting Nicaragua on Viagra.

    One of the problems is we're seen as having lots of money -- and I've had a young farm hand, quite drunk, declare love for me and I know what I look like. Some guys convince themselves that it's a lack of age bias or some thing like that, and go for someone who'd be out of their league if she had money (and you're not really likely to meet the Nicaraguan middle class women because they can go to the US and find husbands there or will find a husband here who is also Nicaraguan, with some exceptions). The guys feel all sorts of chivalric because they're helping some poor woman. Only what's going on in her head may not be so charitable.

    I was on a Costa Rican group for a while and one guy in his 80s had a hot young girl friend. One of the expat women said she hoped the girl friend wasn't playing with his dick. The old guy got angry and accused her of being a dried up old biddy. Three weeks later, he was leaving Costa Rica because the women only loved his wallet. Well, yeah. What do you have in common with a young campesino woman after all? First week I was here, I met a gringo who was in "love" (spelled lust) with a woman in the household where he was staying to do mission work. He couldn't speak Spanish so what was the relationship based on other than his physical attraction. She wasn't a bitch and told him she didn't love him (her family apparently wanted her to play him). He was whining all over the place about. I thought he was lucky she wasn't a bitch.

    One of the things people have to wrap their heads around (and use to control the parts below) is that poor people here are very poor and desperate. The middle class will be very picking about who they take up with (we don't have brilliant reputations as a class of people at least not in Jinotega) and the rich marry the rich. I sympathize with the desperation; I simply do not want it pointed at me because I'm on limited funds myself.

  23. #23
    Active TRN Member webtrainer's Avatar
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    Default Re: Save El Porton Verde (and my son!)

    Yeah, thanks everybody for the comments. I absolutely take the blame for most of what's gone on...it take two to tango and all that...but even me, who's been around this country for years now, has been surprised at the level of mendacity and abomination (lyin' and hatin') coming at me from the other side. I'm on lock down in Managua, no contact whatsoever now that the courts are involved. The ex went around to a couple of non-Nicaraguan friends here in Managua to try to woo them and when they stuck up for me she got pissed off at them! At least that makes me feel good...fumbling for my Ambien pills
    Doors of hope fly open when doors of promise shut. -Thomas D'Arcy McGee

  24. #24
    TRN Science officer bill_bly_ca's Avatar
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    Default Re: Save El Porton Verde (and my son!)

    Quote Originally Posted by Daddy-YO View Post
    Remember Ken Kinzel's story as it played out in Esteli? It should be required reading for all old 'swinging Richards' expats visiting Nicaragua on Viagra.
    A romance in 12 (Rather large) "Parts" - The story was a hack job...
    ==================================================
    Dude !!!.... Its a Canal !!! Can you Dig it ??

  25. #25
    Viejo del Foro el duende grande's Avatar
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    Default Re: Save El Porton Verde (and my son!)

    Think like a Nica here in the land of socialism, christianity , and solidarty-- Pay them for the kid. that's what they want, its part of the "culture".
    Same same on a traffic accident, even gross negligence that would be criminal elsewhere. If you pay off the family, the cops will back out.

    "Support mental health or I'll break your head"


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