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Thread: how to be invisible

  1. #1

    Default how to be invisible

    Gueguense posted on another thread
    "Do your research before moving to Nicaragua.....This place is NOT the place to be for people that have never been outside of their airconditioned suburbs!.

    I have not been in this forum for almost a year due to travel and family illnesses, and I find that Kelly Ann Thomas almost got killed along with her husband while being robbed at gunpoint!!.

    Many people who have a vested interest in having a non-stop gringo influx do not like what I have to say.

    The sandinistas created a class-resentment mantra that has been exacerbated since they came to power in 1979. To be safe you have to be INVISIBLE and dress down, drive beat up cars.

    Kelly and her husband were very very visible. Running a book-store/coffee shop. I am sure the thugs cased her business, and residence.

    As for the newcomers here, people should offer HONEST advise and tell them that Nicaragua is an o.k. place to visit, but forget the ex-pat thing...not going to work long term. This country sooner or later will explode into armed conflict and civil unrest in the near term.

    Talking to the locals in San Juan Del Sur and Rivas, I found an undercurrent of increasing resentment at the gringos who come for the sun and surf. They see gringos come in like colonial overlords buying up the place and change its character.

    The gueguense mentality is very subtle. They may smile to the gringo, but will only tell the truth to a fellow gueguense. That is why election polls in Nicaragua are unreliable.... "


    PLEASE POST YOUR METHODS OF BEING INVISIBLE
    All this for a flag? Michelle Obama http://hotair.com/archives/2011/11/0...our-years-ago/

  2. #2
    House SOB Little Corn Tom's Avatar
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    Default Re: how to be invisible

    Forget the infinity pool.

    Forget the 5,000 ft2 home

    Forget pumping cool water from the Humbolt current to cool your house.

    Forget the enclosed community with a watchee every 10 feet.
    Life's different here ... It's a whole 'nother pace.

  3. #3
    Para aquí para acá Jonh's Avatar
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    Default Re: how to be invisible

    Spend a day or two watching people. Observe how they dress. Dress like them.

    There is no one way Nicaraguans dress, of course. So find Nicas who are "like you" in terms of social class and profession, and see how they dress, what kind of car they drive, and so on.

  4. #4
    Dog Whisperer cookshow's Avatar
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    Default Re: how to be invisible

    Don't wear long pants. Oops, sorry, that only works on the Coast. Only Spaniards, Indians and crazy Tourist wear pants here..

  5. #5
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    Default Re: how to be invisible

    Befriend you neighbors.

  6. #6

    Default Re: how to be invisible

    Quote Originally Posted by Little Corn Tom View Post
    Forget the infinity pool.

    Forget the 5,000 ft2 home

    Forget pumping cool water from the Humbolt current to cool your house.

    Forget the enclosed community with a watchee every 10 feet.
    i keep telling you, it's only 2,000.... if that... probably smaller...

    no one would see the 2 inch schedule 40 pipe for the water, it'd be underground...

    and what's wrong with an enclosed community? shoot, if i make it hippie enough, the criminal type would know i was as poor as the chap from coal tap...

    one way to be invisible is not to offend people, not push thier buttons.... tranquillo baby...
    All this for a flag? Michelle Obama http://hotair.com/archives/2011/11/0...our-years-ago/

  7. #7
    House SOB Little Corn Tom's Avatar
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    Default Re: how to be invisible

    Quote Originally Posted by Dr. Demento View Post

    one way to be invisible is not to offend people, not push thier buttons.... tranquillo baby...
    Only gringo buttons....
    Life's different here ... It's a whole 'nother pace.

  8. #8

    Default Re: how to be invisible

    hahaha! Forget Pacific Marlin or if you want Pacific Marlin become EXTREMELY visible, like Arnoldo Aleman or Daniel Ortega visible... no one will step foot near your house.

  9. #9
    Viejo del Foro El Greco's Avatar
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    Default Re: how to be invisible

    This is Invisible
    Dios es Amor!

  10. #10

    Default Re: how to be invisible

    Quote Originally Posted by Dr. Demento View Post
    PLEASE POST YOUR METHODS OF BEING INVISIBLE
    That one is real easy! dont hang around gringos and 95% of the job is done!

    remember that post about some hapless gringo tourists who got robbed on their way from Granada to the airport? this was a while back, and may have been in fydel's website...

    i remember saying that a smart nica would not have shared that bus or taxi with them since it would make that vehicle a target for thieves.

    Gueguense suggests the following:

    1) no flip-flop or birkenstocks please! we dont want to see your patas hediondas
    2) Shave!: unkempt beards are not cool, and in certain quarters in latin-america you might be seen either as
    a) a communist or b) middle eastern (arab or jew) or c) both

    3) No flower/Hawaiian shirts.
    that makes you an obvious
    a) gringo tourist or b) a cochon

    4) Tattoos should be covered....many nicas see tattoos and think of
    a) Salvadoran marero wannabees
    b) Cuban escoria (scum) and/or marielitos
    c) involved with drugs

    5) I guess the same woud apply to piercings......nose rings are for toros not people.....

    6) if you are European do all 1-5 AND use deodorant and take a shower twice-a-day AND do not wear again any item of clothing continuously for a week. soap and detergent are your friends.

    7) If you are an european female, shave your armpits...you dont want to be mistaken for la chamuca, as she is widely despised!

  11. #11
    Para aquí para acá Jonh's Avatar
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    Default Re: how to be invisible

    Quote Originally Posted by Gueguense View Post
    1) no flip-flop or birkenstocks please! we dont want to see your patas hediondas
    2) Shave!: unkempt beards are not cool, and in certain quarters in latin-america you might be seen either as
    a) a communist or b) middle eastern (arab or jew) or c) both
    This guy was in Esteli, the maids were making fun of him saying they thought he was wearing a wig.



    They called him Canadian, maybe not wanting to offend me by associate him with my own native country, not sure. I don't think they thought he was a communist, just a freak. There are plenty of Nicas with Che hats and stickers to show they are communists.

  12. #12

    Default Re: how to be invisible

    Quote Originally Posted by Jonh View Post
    This guy was in Esteli, the maids were making fun of him saying they thought he was wearing a wig. There are plenty of Nicas with Che hats and stickers to show they are communists.
    That dude is PROOF of what I just posted. That rasta/dreadlock wannabe is certainly falls under my guidelines. the worse ones are those blond gringuitos who have their hair made up to look like Bob Marley....I call them Pelo de Tuza......cornsilk hair

    we have plenty of native piricuacos, and foreign wannabes ....that would be just too much to bear!

  13. #13

    Default Re: how to be invisible

    Quote Originally Posted by Little Corn Tom View Post
    Only gringo buttons....
    All this for a flag? Michelle Obama http://hotair.com/archives/2011/11/0...our-years-ago/

  14. #14

    Default Re: how to be invisible

    thanks to all who posted...

    i thought an "ave maria" in the back window of the toyota hilux would make one blend in....

    and what kinda hat would be the best?

    i think long pants would be the best on the pacific side...
    All this for a flag? Michelle Obama http://hotair.com/archives/2011/11/0...our-years-ago/

  15. #15
    Para aquí para acá Jonh's Avatar
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    Default Re: how to be invisible


  16. #16
    Dog Whisperer cookshow's Avatar
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    Default Re: how to be invisible

    Quote Originally Posted by Gueguense View Post
    That one is real easy! dont hang around gringos and 95% of the job is done!

    remember that post about some hapless gringo tourists who got robbed on their way from Granada to the airport? this was a while back, and may have been in fydel's website...

    i remember saying that a smart nica would not have shared that bus or taxi with them since it would make that vehicle a target for thieves.

    Gueguense suggests the following:

    1) no flip-flop or birkenstocks please! we dont want to see your patas hediondas
    2) Shave!: unkempt beards are not cool, and in certain quarters in latin-america you might be seen either as
    a) a communist or b) middle eastern (arab or jew) or c) both

    3) No flower/Hawaiian shirts.
    that makes you an obvious
    a) gringo tourist or b) a cochon

    4) Tattoos should be covered....many nicas see tattoos and think of
    a) Salvadoran marero wannabees
    b) Cuban escoria (scum) and/or marielitos
    c) involved with drugs

    5) I guess the same woud apply to piercings......nose rings are for toros not people.....

    6) if you are European do all 1-5 AND use deodorant and take a shower twice-a-day AND do not wear again any item of clothing continuously for a week. soap and detergent are your friends.

    7) If you are an european female, shave your armpits...you dont want to be mistaken for la chamuca, as she is widely despised!
    1) We call them Chinellas (sp) fashionable footwear here.
    2) I am guilty, but seldom confused for a communist, the others a possibility.
    3) Over here TV is king, they think I am Magnum PI. Hawaiian shirts rock.
    4) No problem with those
    5) I did not pierce my Hog's nose for fear he would be branded a tourist, 100% right on that one.
    6) I have a friend that will only ride on the front of the Panga down to Bluefield's, always ask me why White people no bathe.
    7)Avoid at all cost.

  17. #17
    TRN's fiesty redhead catahoula fan's Avatar
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    Default Re: how to be invisible

    4) Tattoos should be covered....many nicas see tattoos and think of
    a) Salvadoran marero wannabees
    b) Cuban escoria (scum) and/or marielitos
    c) involved with drugs
    I was in Immigration w/ my lawyer the other day and a middle-aged Nica female walked by w/ a big tattoo on the upper arm. I looked at him quickly to see his reaction. He said something about the mark of the beast...needless to say, I didn't mention mine.
    "Patience is a virtue, but persistence to the point of success is a blessing."

  18. #18

    Default Re: how to be invisible

    I have always called them corn heads, my way of labeling I guess.
    I always if nothing else out of respect for the locals that do go out of their way to look their best, I try to stay stay clean shaven and so on.
    I never said I was normal !

  19. #19

    Default Re: how to be invisible

    Quote Originally Posted by catahoula fan View Post
    I was in Immigration w/ my lawyer the other day and a middle-aged Nica female walked by w/ a big tattoo on the upper arm. I looked at him quickly to see his reaction. He said something about the mark of the beast...needless to say, I didn't mention mine.
    growing up catholic, that is something that the catholic church inculcates it's members with.

    is he catholic? that's my suspicion.....
    All this for a flag? Michelle Obama http://hotair.com/archives/2011/11/0...our-years-ago/

  20. #20
    Viejo del Foro bikingo's Avatar
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    Default Re: how to be invisible

    Quote Originally Posted by Gueguense View Post
    That dude is PROOF of what I just posted. That rasta/dreadlock wannabe is certainly falls under my guidelines. the worse ones are those blond gringuitos who have their hair made up to look like Bob Marley....I call them Pelo de Tuza......cornsilk hair

    we have plenty of native piricuacos, and foreign wannabes ....that would be just too much to bear!
    This dude would never be assaulted all the maleantes would be terrified of pioho's But he would probably get alot of things thrown at him from passing vehicles.

  21. #21
    TRN Science officer bill_bly_ca's Avatar
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    Default Re: how to be invisible

    [QUOTE=cookshow;102158]1) We call them Chinellas (sp) fashionable footwear here.
    [quote]

    And the most handy item for any self respecting mother/grandmother to grab at a moments notice to inflict swift and just punishment when required
    ==================================================
    Dude !!!.... Its a Canal !!! Can you Dig it ??

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